Long Distance relationship kills and challenges me.

it’s been 5 days since we have our last conversation.. Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko sa bawat minuto, oras at araw na lumilipas na hindi mo sya nakakausap para na akong mamatay sa lungkot..,Isang buwan n sya sa barko..pero ako ito pa din patuloy na nalulungkot.. msyado lang ba akong malungkutin or tlagang ndi ko kayang mag isa at maiwan… minsan pag sobrang tagal ng walang balita natutula na lang ako at iniisip kung galit ba sya or mhal pa ba nya ako..? hay hirap naman… gabi na gabi n lang na malungkot at nakakatulog na umiiyak.. Minsan nga naisip ko na mas mabuti pa palang konti lang ang sweldo at least magkasama… pero sa panahon ngaun… ndi dapat dahil sa hirap ng buhay kaya kahit mahirap pra sa aming dalawa kelangan tanggapin na ganito na ang buhay namin…. Sana sa pagtagal ng panahon..mas maging matatag kami at manitili sa aming pagmamahal.. Lagi ko n lang pinagdarasal na sana maayos sya at laging masaya…At sana sya na ang makasama ko habang buhay.. Wala na akong mahihiling pa kundi ang makasama sya sa buong buhay ko dito sa mundo.. sa lahat ng magnda o pangit na nangyari sa aming buhay.. Mapalad ako na ako ang minahal nya sa kabila ng kasamaang ugaling pinakita ko dati..lahat un pinag sisihan ko na at puro pagmamahal n lang.. nangangako ako na hindi ko na sya sasaktan kahit kelan.. Mahal n Mahal kita… sa muling pagkikita natin sana ako pa din ang mahal mo.. Maghihitay ako kahit gaano ka pa katagal dyan… MAhal na mhal kita Van… Ikaw lang at wala ng iba.. Salamat sa lahat ng pagmamahal at pag- aalaga mo sakin.. Isang kang biyaya….

\/..@..|\| Sailing..First monthsary on ship

Three letters easy to say . This name changed my whole life.. A God given gift that you will never regret, of course every gift of God cannot be regret by anyone. But i tell  you this man  is super awesome.. everyone who knew this man, talks good about him.., i wonder why he loves me despite of my bad attitude, this man of my life made me realize the power of love.. You will be accepted by what you are even you’re the ugliest or the worst person on earth. There will always  be a person who will love you for what you are no matter what happen.  A true love, that comes within every person’s hearts., All the couples i know has different stories to tell. Forgive my corny stories, i just want to express my feelings by writing it on a blog and i don’t have closed friends to tell my stories because the man i love  is thousands or millions  miles away from me as well as my BFF who is currently living in New York. Currently he is sailing Going to Singapore, and if he is in the middle of the ocean, Hmmpp..no signal.. I almost die, if he doesn’t responds to my texts, and what worst about it is that they don’t have internet in the ship. Im trying to understand all this trials because this is his life and this is his dreams.. But what im afraid of are the pirates, big waves, BI friends and of course the most scary of all are the GROs. But he said to me that he loves me and he wants to take good care of his profession that’s why all the things im afraid of, vanished because of his promise.. I want to tell the world that i am the most happiest person on earth to  have VAN JAMILLA in my life.. ILOVEYOU so much.. and i miss you..

My very special one :)

When we were young, we just love to play, sing, dance or whatever we want, we are free. isn’t it?  As we grow older different people come to our way. Of course our parents, siblings and friends are always there for us. But as time goes by there is this person who will be behind us for the rest of our lives. I can still remember when i was a kid, i was being tagged as ugly, maybe because im fat, dark, lousy, etc. i did’nt mind that because i was just a kid. But when i entered high school everything changed, i tried to fixed myself, or in short i want to be beautiful, because i do have a crush..hahahaha.. i thought the guy who i want did’nt like me at all, but when he knew that i liked him, he courted me and i ended up falling to him. our relationship did’nt work out because i want it  secret but he doesn’t want,…and there were many things we  argued most. We didnt have  a date or any sweet moment together. Hahahah is this  PUPPY LOVE? hmmp..  But after a year i saw him with other girl and really it felt hurt……… But i tried to move on…i thought no one would like me because im a busy kind of person, i focused more on my studies and ofcourse to my family. But a guy named VAN came to my life, actually he is my seatmate, i really hate this man because he is not the kind of person i want, because he dressed like a gangster, he wore eye liner, and he loved to wear accessories, and he is not gentleman.  He courted my friend for almost a year, imagine a guy like him can court for a year, but my friend didn’t like him, so he courted my best friend’s sister but then like i said she did’nt like it too, after so many courtships. He courted me, i thought he was joking because i’m not the person he likes, and i disregarded him, but he tried his best to get my attention.When we graduated highschool, he followed me, it has been a year and half , he never stopped until i said YES. Yes we were in relationship, and im not that serious to take our relationship to that very deepest level, but as the years went by, i really felt that this was very different.  A feeling that can make you mature. Van is a very lovely man. He will do everything to make me happy even i used to hurt him, still he will say sorry instead of me. I  admired his personality. Everytime im alone he is there to make me happy, he gives me a shoulder to cry on, a shoulder to lean on., (OMG i was crying to remember all this things). I really love this MAN.  Million Thanks is not enough for me to express my gratitude to him because i owe him everything.  He changed me to the extent that i clearly see how life is important, how to honor God, how to live my life, how to get rid of jealous, everything.. And now the he is away from me,  because he is a SEAMAN, i can’t imagine my life without him, i missed him a lot, it is hard for us because we seldom communicate, i dont know what is happening to him at this point of time, that i even blame the telecommunication companies that charge too much to those who are in abroad that we really need to save money, in order to have this communication.. I know we are not married to react this way but having been away from the person you really love more that yourself, it’s difficult, really difficult, you will realize all the things that you do, even small things.. OMG i miss you so much.. i hope we can surpass this challenge that God gave us.. I just want to say to this person..Thank you and I will always here to wait and to love you.. May God always watch you……I love you so much.<3

Strong

We can’t escape problems isn’t it. Sometimes i wonder why do we have this kind of problems, sometimes i think that “Is God really wanted me to suffer or to be strong?” by taking the positive one, i need to be strong because i know that everything has a purpose. God wanted me to be strong  and mature enough to face every challenges in life.

I need to be strong not just for myself but for my family and to the persons who needs my assistance. Please Guide me always even though i am a great sinner you still listen to me and helped me every time i call your Blessed Name. Thank you Lord and i will always praise your name.

Hostage Crisis

Last monday, August 23, 2010 Hostage in Quirino Grandstand, Philippines happened. It was a tremendous event that stop the whole world. Mendoza, the hostage taker, wanted to revenge because of what happened to him. The revenge killed 8 Hong Kong citizens who suppose to enjoy their vacation here in our country. Their sudden enjoyment resulted to death. Where was our president during the said event? What was the order to stop it?

As a Filipino citizen, we should admit our mistake to Hong Kong, and prove to them that we are not like Mendoza, we are hospitable to make every visitors of our country satisfied during their visit. We should pray for the victims as well as for both countries, and assure the whole world that it will never happen again. What we need right now is to admit our fault. Stop blaming one another because it will just lead to a nonsense matter,  we should be focusing on the investigation to make it accurate and give the result to Hong Kong as soon as possible.

13 years of friendship!

13 years of friendship.. it all started when were in grade 2,  we were destined to know each other, that brought us to the deepest relationship of our friendship., I was not able to talk at first, not able to speak what was on my mind but through the help of them i was able to express myself fully and came out from my shell.

Friendship is an endless relationship between two or more individuals. It is a very sensitive relationship that when it breaks it will be hard to repair. it is important that you have understanding and consideration to one another so that the relationship will last for a lifetime. I can say this because i experienced having a good and best friend that really helps me to stand for everything.  i owe her a lot together with her sister. I can say that they are really trustworthy persons. I’ve been with AEY MOCLING for 13 years though i don’t still know her to the extent, i am the happiest person having her as friend for life. She is a kind of person that will really help you whether financially or emotionally, she is not PLASTIC.  Kind Words are not enough to describe her but i can say one You are the BEST. Thank you!!!

To Mavee, though we were not batch mates i can say that you are a secretive person, and don’t let anybody bypass you. A very strong individual but a kind hearted lady, i hope you will be more happier to the new life you have now. I wish you all the best for your start. I hope someday we can be together again laughing, having story telling and sharing of jokes and eating barbecue. Just take care of yourself and your parents as well as zyra.

Mocling sisters are more like friends to me, they are my sisters not by blood but by heart.  The friendship we had establish will last until the end of time. Thank you and God Bless to your new endeavor.

SAYANG!

Sayang- a filipino word that means a lot.  A word that can make a person rattle to do the things for the second time. It is an event that we usually didn’t do the effort that supposedly done.

A situation or event that we cannot undo, and we always say “SAYANG di ko nagawa ang best ko.., SAYANG di na pwedeng ibalik ang nangyari.

It only means that we should do our best every time we present ourselves to others, it is better to be prepared always, so that you will not say SAYANG!

Thank You God

Thank you God for all the things we have in our lives,

The world you gave us,

The challenges that make us strong,

The graces we receive everyday,

The healthy body and spirit,

The parents we have right now,

The good relationships in our family,

The country we are living,

The loved ones who continuously comfort us,

The sins you always forgiven,

Thank you very much and we have nothing to wish for

But to be with you in the end our our lives.

We love you Lord please Guide us always.

Burden!

I know that most people have burdens in life though heavy or simple, but still they are considered burdens. Burdens are the things that make people problematic and uncontrollable.

Being a person is not easy, that’s what i noticed because we are living in a judgemental society they critized everything we do whether good or bad, we need to survive the unending trials whether small or big, and we cannot see the world if we dont have this and that..

I know that everything needs a sacrifice in order to be happy, sometimes i feel very weak and able to surrender but then i dont want because it’s part of God’s plan, i know that he knows how hard we strive for our ultimate goal. But I never fail to ask myself  why do we need this, can we be happy everytime, no worries, no problems, and no more burdens, it’s good to see all people are loving, sharing, respecting and serving. Even we are here on earth we can be in heaven if we are going to make all of these with love and guidance of our Almigthy.

God knows everything, even we complain sometimes we should still believe in him because He is the only one who gave ourlives in order to feel his creation and unending love. Burdens are burdens lets take it always in a positive way.

Enjoy life to the fullest!!

Loving Arms sung by Dixie chicks